Self Doubt

OK, so here’s the deal. I started this blog last night and agonized about whether or not I was confident enough to put it out there. The bottom line is, I’m not. It’s silly, it’s narcissistic, and I’m pretty embarrassed at myself. BUT, here goes nothing. I am going to write my musings, as Jayne calls them, and just see what happens. I want to eventually write books so I might as well start somewhere.  I put on Facebook yesterday that we should start where we are because it’s our only choice. So this is where I am and I’m starting. I’m putting my hand to the plow, I’m diving in, I’m giving God something to bless. I know He has things for me to do and say and I’m just getting myself in a position to start.

You know, God doesn’t give us the whole picture at one time, oh how I wish He would, but alas, that’s not the way He works, at least in my experience. The manna came from heaven every day, right? The Israelites were not allowed to store it up, they had to trust Him every day, and they had to walk outside and pick that manna up. So this is me picking up the manna and expecting that there will be more tomorrow.


Where do you live?

Welcome to my first post. Wow, what a way to get the party started. Over coffee this morning with my husband of nearly 14 years, I decided I was going to start a blog. So here I am, dog asleep next to me, Texas Longhorns on the TV, muted of course, and on hold with American Airlines, all the while going to WordPress and starting a blog. Nifty, huh?

I chose this grassy, glorious theme because I had a thought. This gorgeous meadow overlooking the ocean is where I would like to be. It is idyllic, it is picturesque, it is serene, but it’s not where I am. It is not even close to where I am. I am home, on the couch, in Tulsa, Oklahoma, it’s evening, still 90 degrees outside, my hair is dirty and I have heartburn. This is reality. This is where I live.

I want to show people in my blog that I am real, that I am a real, live, woman. I am a wife, a Mom, a secretary, and a thousand other things, but sometimes, I actually have something insightful to say. I’ve only been on this road of life for 38 years, but when you were raised in and around ministry, that time is doubled, kind of like dog years, I’m really nearly 80!

Anyway, I hope you stop by to read every once in a while. I hope I can encourage you that you are going to make it, that you’re not alone in your situation, and that God is faithful.

As you can see, after nearly 2 years of blogging, I finally figured out how to change my blog’s appearance. I am digging the new design at the top of my pages… so funky, so 2012… at least that’s what I’m telling myself.

But in the spirit of being the detail-oriented person that I am, I felt I had to address this very first post of mine because it mentions the grassy scene that was my blog cover picture for 2 years. Now the picture is gone and I didn’t want you, my awesome readers and friends, to think I was nuts. The end!


Time for another change of blog design. Hope you like it!